Friend-Zones and Headfucks
This is a long one I’m afraid. And this is the shortened version. Haha!…
On New Years Eve 2008, I was in a relationship with ‘him’. I’d arranged a house party at mine with him and the Banter Brigade because I cannot stand going out on New Years, it’s ridiculous and shit… The midnight bells came and went, and I noticed ‘he’ had drank a little too much, so I sent him to bed (we’d had issues in the past regarding his drinking, so I didn’t put up with any drunken nonsense). I retired too an hour or so later and as soon as I’d lay down received a text message from Corbett (who was downstairs in my living room) which went along the lines of “He’s a lucky man getting to sleep next you tonight”. I deleted it straight away, passing it off as a drunken one-off. This lad had been my mate for a few years, and that text was never mentioned afterwards – I didn’t really want any complications. Especially with someone I was out with almost every weekend.
When me and ‘him’ were going through our break, I sent a text out to a few of the boys saying “Looks like I’m single now boys. Let’s all get it on. Haha Xx”, and then got one back off Corbett saying “I wish you were being serious”. A conversation ensued where he basically said he liked me a lot but he was worried anything happening would ruin the friendship we had – which I totally understood. And although I didn’t understand why he had told me in the first place, we agreed to leave the issue and carry on just being ‘mates’.
When I was newly single, and therefore acting all footloose and fancy free, every time we were out and I found myself dancing with another lad, I’d notice Corbett standing on the sidelines looking over as if he was about to kick off. I found myself doing it too though, I hated seeing him dancing with other girls. If that situation ever came about I’d just go and girate myself behind him until his attention was diverted then leave him alone… How mature… I really did like him. And the fact I knew he liked me just made it worse, wanting what I couldn’t have. Blah blah blah…
This all carried on for a few weeks and then I met Matt. When we went out on a date one Saturday, the gang all went out to Burnley and I arranged to meet them there afterwards. The story I got from the Wife was that all night Corbett was asking where I was, who I was with, and when I was coming out. Every time Emma got a text, he was asking if I was on my way and what I was doing… When I eventually did arrive, Emma told him she was meeting me at the entrance and he said he would wait at the side for us to get back. However, once we got there (and after a quick trip to the toilets so the Wife could tell me the entire nights events) he was gone… A few minutes later he appeared from nowhere with some peroxide blonde polyester dressed horror of a bird’s hand in his, and giving me a quick wink he led her to the dancefloor where they started getting off with each other and dirty dancing. I went for a fag and sent him a text saying “I’m almost embarrased for you”… I saw him 15mins later, he said he thought I’d ”fucked off home” already, I asked him why I would have and that it should be him going home, and a verbal fight began between us. I clarified that he had done it deliberately, and if he had stuff to say to me, he should be saying it, not playing silly games and ignoring the issue. He shrugged it off.
The tension was always there afterwards, we both just kept our distance until the Thursday night in Burnley where we both got wankered and ended up getting off with eachother outside his house (mentioned in a previous blog entry). And to clarify again, HE initiated that kiss, not me. I gave an innocent enough hug and cheek kiss to which he replyied “Is that all I get then?”… The necking commenced.
Before Mexico it was all hyped up that we were gonna be shagging on holiday because “What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico”. And that was true, but the secrets we shared sadly don’t involve a night of passion. We both pulled other people in front of eachother there and we pulled eachother on a couple of nights too, and it wasn’t even an issue. We were all there to have good time and enjoy ourselves…
When we got our alone time, rather than spending it strapping up and smacking up, we spent it talking about our past, present and future. He made a schoolboy error and told me that he basically wants to be a bastard. That if he likes a girl, he’ll let her know, but as soon as they show any interest, he turns it off and acts a dick with them. He’d been hurt in the past, big time, and admitted outright that he didn’t like failing. If anything serious were to happen with a girl which then messed up, that would be a fail, so he just didn’t want to bother. It wasn’t worth the hassle and the hurt etc etc.
We stayed up until 6am the next morning just talking. In a way he’d made himself more vulnerable, showing me his weak points and telling me his game plan. Walking back to the rooms he said he liked me (again) but that we were mates and that made it weird for him to deal with… then he gave me a good snog and groped me for half an hour in the corridor. We were in separate rooms and both had our mates inside. If there would have been somewhere to go we would have slept together that night. It genuinely felt like the perfect time to do it because we’d already shared so much…. I just sound gay now. Haha.
Coming back home and back to reality, we now have had no resolution to this issue. 6 months on and there’s been no getting it out of our system and moving on with a clear head. The tension and feelings are most definitely still there; both positive and negative ones. And the games are being played from both sides more than ever. However… I’ve decided to keep my distance now. He told my Wife how fit she was on Friday night after we got back from Mexico, and how everyone liked her. Then he made out like all he’d ever wanted to do was be my friend and that I kept on pushing the issue with him to make it more. I know his game, but my other mates don’t. And I don’t want to be made out to be some desperate mug who is following him around like a lost puppy. We’ll just have to see what comes of this one I think. But I just want this over and done with to be honest.
Why must boys play games with us? And why do I love to play along?
Mexican Mayhem
Sorry for the delay in blogging. A combination of jet-lag and drinking had stopped me from updating. And to be honest, there’s not really so much to update regarding the old Nejjy sex life anyway… Here’s the big picture though… I got NO SEX in Mexico. Nothing, nowt, nada. Not even off the “mate” of mine who was practically a dead cert. I was expecting some first-class hotel swimming pool sex and all I got off him was grief and a head-blag (Don’t worry, he’ll get his own blog in a bit, there’s far too much to write about him to be honest).
A factor which must most definitely be taken into consideration, was that the hotel we were stopping in, although it was all inclusive, apparently did not include a plethora of dirty sexy boys, and instead mainly consisted of newlyweds, old women who insisted on going topless, and the middle-aged parents of annoying children. Thank the lord we were a 3 quid taxi ride away from a Playa del Carmen which had beach clubs and bars (aka actual real-life boys we could snog and get groped by).
I got off to a good start on the second night I bagged myself a black boy from L.A. who slightly resembled Travis McCoy from Gym Class Heroes… fit. Third night a Mexican Entertainment Rep called Javier (pronounced Havier, haha – how stereotypical??). He had a tongue bar which, even though to start off with I didn’t quite know what he wanted me to do with it, I very much enjoyed him ramming it in my mouth… Mid-week, me and the wife went crazy and ploughed our way through our own group of friends. Mainly 3-way kissing, but a few straight pulls. Nothing serious though – all banter.
The second to last night we decided to turn it up a notch or two. Me and the wife went on it full force at Coco Bongo’s in Cancun and literally got off with every boy within a 6.5 meter radius of the spot where we were dancing. I pulled myself (within the space of only two hours may I add); a 26 year old fella from Ormskirk, his much hotter hunkier blonde mate, their other mate (well, I didn’t want him to feel left out!), a hot hot hot lad from Lincoln who I’d spied on the way in and pre-introduced myself, a 19 year old baby-faced Brazilian boy, and his slightly older brother, who in my opinion used a little bit too much tongue for my liking. Brilliant.
The rest of the holiday was filled with pure banter, Mexican Moistening, sunbathing, swimming, card games, and tequila drinking (how cliché eh). Luckily there was no eyebrow or head shaving, so all boys returned home safely with both testicles intact.
To summarise, I may not have gone all the way with a random (or a “mate”), but I still had a bloofy fantastic holiday, and a good drinking and bonding time with the wife and the Banter Boys. Plus, this all means I can keep my “I’ve never had a one night stand” badge and wear it with pride! Whoop for me… I think. Ach, who am I kidding, I’ve clearly never lived! Haha…Can’t wait for what shenanigans next year will bring!
